Tomb into the Womb

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A vision of my ancestor in 1994 began the search in 1998. I heard the word “gilgul” just before a huge angel appeared and took my hand. I was transported to ancient Jerusalem where I saw the walled city from an aerial viewpoint and landed just outside in the desert. My previous lifetime was revealed in a two-part vision. The first part was of his past mission and the second part was of his death.

The desert was dark from the night and the man was wearing sandals. The sharp stones on the ground pierced the soles of his shoes. He sought refuge for the night for it is not wise to sojourn in the desert at night. He climbed a short distance up the rocks to a cave and crawled inside. Staying the night, he awoke early the next morning to daven. He pulled out a wooden stick utensil from his robe and dipped it in ink from a horn-shaped pouch hanging on the outside of the robe. “The Holy Man” wrote the words from G-d. Exiting the cave, one could see the magnificent surroundings of the desert. He stretched his body, gazing at the striated rock formations of the cliffs. Carefully descending into the valley, he found the path to continue the journey.

It is from this vision that I recognized the location and found the entrance to the cave. I began the exploration in 1998. It took some searching and I was about to quit when I sat down on a rock to have lunch. I noticed out of the corner of my eye to my right a “boy on a donkey”. He was wearing a bright blue shirt and looked to be in his early twenties. He rode right up to me and got off his donkey. He could barely speak English but was able to utter one word, “Cave”.

He reached out to take my hand and lead me to the nearest cave entrance. I stood before it. “No, I don’t think so.” The next cave was a little higher up. No, not this one either. He rubbed his chin in contemplation, then held up his index finger to indicate one more. We climbed higher and he had to practically pull me up to the last cave. “Yes, this is it.” Thanks to my experience with Rabbi Khadoury, I was able to remember. I thanked him and placed a few shekels in his hand which he did not even look at. Then he turned to scale back down the cliff got on his donkey and was gone.

I crawled inside the small opening and sat against the cave wall exactly where my ancestor sat. The ceiling was low so I couldn’t stand up. Towards the back of the cave the ceiling seemed higher, but it was dark and I did not have a flashlight. I went into town to purchase one and returned the next day. Just as I entered the dark cave, an air raid siren went off. Saddam Hussein was bombing Israel with Scud missiles.

I sat frozen for hours afraid to explore any further. The siren stopped and I left and came back the next day. The siren went off again. I had such overwhelming fear that if something were to happen to me, no one would find me for days. I could die in this cave. The fear overtook me and I left once again when the siren stopped. There was only one day left before Shabbos so I needed to muster up the courage to go to the back of the cave.

The next morning, I went to the bus stop as usual to wait for the bus and saw from the corner of my eye a man making his way through the small crowd of people waiting for the bus. He was wearing a denim shirt and a cap with a backpack slung over his shoulder. He approached me and reached out his hand for a handshake, uttering the word “Selichot”. I later found out that means “Pardon me”. Astonished by his gesture I obligingly shook his hand. He immediately turned away and crossed the street. Why didn’t he wait for the bus? He was gone after a bus drove by in the opposite direction. The whole incident was so strange I knew something special was going to happen that day. It seemed as if he was congratulating me for my success, even though it had not happened yet.

I entered the cave on all fours and headed towards the back with a small flashlight in my hand. I could now stand up and I shined the light onto the wall as I began to move forward. Suddenly I stepped into a pit and fell six to eight feet down, landing on my back at the bottom with the flashlight still in my hand. I slowly brought the flashlight in front of me and shined the light into an opening of a tomb. Suddenly I saw a sepulcher and stood up. I shined the light inside the tomb but did not go inside, instead, I climbed out in haste. I felt very light as I scaled the wall of the pit as if angels were lifting me up. I was so terrified I thought I would vomit or pass out. As I crawled to the entrance of the cave I rolled over and saw a swirling light come into me with images of my ancestor and ancient Jerusalem. I succumbed and went into a deep sleep. Stay tuned for part two of the story…